I’m at the library studying, for once. This is only the second time I’ve left my dorm building to do homework in my entire college experience. The first time was earlier this semester. The main reason I’m here now is because I thought my roommate might be concerned if she came back to our room after being gone all day and I was in the exact same position at my desk as I was when she left…So I left her a note on my whiteboard saying I headed to the library to slay the mighty Literary Journalism Essay-dragon, and headed out.
What can I say. I like my desk, I have everything I need there, and I don’t have to hike across campus. Have I ever mentioned how lazy I am when it comes to that?
Needing a change of scenery and the allure of finding a cute little study nook was also a factor in getting me to the library tonight, though, I must admit. Though it being a sunday evening, most of the good ones were already full when I got here. Five hours ago.
The bathrooms in the library are incredibly creepy. I avoid them. They’re quite tiny, and rather dark. Thankfully, this is because there is only one light source, so I don’t have to worry about counting the shadows. Unthankfully, they look like good hide-outs for a serial killer. My roommate has been watching scary movies in the spirit of halloween lately. I don’t watch them with her, but I think their presence is beginning to affect my judgment anyway.
Though I think I would take a serial killer over the Vashta Nerada any day. At least serial killers are human. Beware of the dust motes.
It’s freakily quiet in here – for once I don’t need music to drown out background noises. The far-away hum of the air conditioning and the sighing (hacking?) of my laptop’s fan are enough. I feel rather as though I am in a time warp…my study nook doesn’t have a window in it (like I said, all the best spots were taken) so I can’t judge time that way. Florescent lighting leaves everything looking like noon. However, as I’m beginning to fall asleep where I sit now, I know it’s definitely getting late.
I have managed a start on my LitJ essay, these past few hours. A pretty decent start, but just a start nonetheless. The hum of the air conditioning is nice white noise, but it also tends to sink into one’s brain and remove all semblance of thought for long stretches of time, leaving one staring blankly at the blinking cursor on the computer screen for many minutes. Another reason I study best in my room.
I had hoped to get more of my essay written than I have – but at least I’ve been productive on some other things. The essay isn’t due until Tuesday evening. There should be plenty of time between now and then to work in some good research and figure out my scope. In theory. Plenty of time, so therefore plenty of late nights. It’s not like those don’t happen already anyway.
The Library is starting to get to me – all the silence. It’s not empty, but it certainly feels it. The florescent lighting has worked its way into my brain, and is vibrating it around inside my skull. I will probably leave soon and head back to my room, and bed. Let the lovely cold fall air outside clear the florescent lights from my head, eh? I won’t look at the ground as I walk. I never can, at night, anymore. Too many streetlights, here…too many shadows. I love shadows. But only when they’re singular.
Is it possible to be paranoid of a fictional death? All this library-talk is beginning to make me think…wandering through the stacks…in the darkness…because here on the third floor, the lights over the stacks stay off unless you turn them on, which I’m not completely sure how to do…
Yes, I think it’s time for bed. Slaying the mighty Literary Journalism Essay-dragon can wait.