Growing Up

Ok. This poem…I’m not totally happy about. I wanted it to more touch on the fact of having to grow up physically, but still being a child mentally and emotionally; as well as portraying the struggle of watching everyone ELSE grow up and yet remaining behind yourself. (Will I cling to the broken, worn-out shadow/Of childhood fairyland?/Everyone is growing up but me…) But…I kind of really like how it is now, with the three sections getting progressively older. So thus I’m not editing it, and will leave the struggle between growing up and wanting only to stay young for another poem. =)

~~~

Silent I sit, and watch
As a thousand fairies flit over the grass
Glowing in the dusk
They are turning the dewdrops to filmy glass

Slowly I stand, and laugh
Holding out my fingers for them to see
I take one in my hand
Touch it gently, smile, then set it free

Sadly I turn, and go
Skipping back to the house where my mother waits
Calling me in to bed
For I am young and small, and it is late

No thoughts of growing up
Of becoming so suddenly both wiser and stronger
No thoughts of being brave
Of holding on tight as the years drag out longer

~~~

Silent I sit, and watch
As the lightning bugs shiver and break up the night
Flickering on and off
Touching the dewdrops with droplets of light

Slowly I stand, and smile
Watch their lights start to scatter as I walk in the dark
I reach out to capture one
It escapes through my fingers in a frightened arc

Sadly I turn, and go
Walking back to the house where reality stands
Beckoning my mind
For I am growing under his heavy hand

The thoughts of growing up
Of becoming so suddenly both wiser and stronger
The thoughts of being brave
Hold on to me tight as the years drag out longer

~~~

Silent I sit, and watch
As darkness falls quickly to cover the sky
Blotting out the stars
A blanket so thick you can’t see when I cry

Slowly I stand, and sigh
Trying just for a moment to hold back the tears
Reaching for what is lost
Wanting back the time when I had no fears

Sadly I turn, and go
Cringing back to the world of grown up life
Caught inside my mind
Between fantasies of children and the real world of strife

For I am growing up
But I am becoming neither wiser nor stronger
I don’t know how to be brave
Hold on tight to my heart as the years drag out longer

~~~

Will I cling to the broken, worn-out shadow
Of childhood fairyland?
Everyone is growing up but me
Will I be left behind, not one caring hand?

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One Comment Add yours

  1. “Wanting back the time when I had no fears”

    Beautiful Eirwyn! and haunting.

    Like

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